So let’s move on to marriage problems and money issues.

Let’s begin with an important point. There are issues that you can’t help in life. There are other issues you can have under your control. You can’t control a bad economy but you can control to some degree the economics of your home. Money stresses, in a marriage are as big or bigger than sex issues. You need to handle those to avoid marriage problems.

In dealing with money issues and marriage problems I like to draw from the saying, “If all you have is lemons, make lemonade”. If your family’s economics aren’t the best, a way to improve your marriage rather than have marriage problems is to find ways to not use your credit card that can bring you and your spouse together. The first suggestion, here, is stop eating out when finances are tight. Find ways to cook together, eat together, spend time together.

Delegate the responsibilities of the meal so everyone participates. Family participation, as a unit, creates a “we’re in this together” mentality that often creates great bonds. When doing these things, reinforce this concept, by verbally speaking about how you, as a family, are in this together. If it’s in you, pray together about being thankful about how lucky you are to have each other.

The second part of reducing stress and improving your marriage is stop spending so much money with your credit cards. I guarantee you if your credit card bills are more manageable it is one more thing that will decrease the pressure on the marriage. Marriage problems are created by not putting the family first. Buying things, going out to eat and buying new cars are fun. Overspending your budget isn’t. Put your family first, live within your budget, be a team and keep yourself healthy and you have the best chance to a great marriage.

Sincerely,

Dr. Bocknek

The Problem Solving Expert for Parents and Families

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Dr. Robert Bocknek is the problem solving expert for marriage, parents and families at www.takebackthehome.com and www.keyboard-culture-parenting.com.  He can be reached at bocknek@takebackthehome.com. He is author of the “Take Back the Home course” and the “Learning how to Learn course” which can be seen at www.takebackthehome.com.

     

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